Trust When I Can't See

A song I heard on the radio this morning had these lyrics, "I will go where You lead; I will trust when I can't see; this is my offering." God is leading us to this next place in our lives, but we can't see a lot of the future. So, we will trust when we can't see.

Ryan, Chris, and Kit Kat arrived at my parents' last night after 20 hours of driving! I'm so thankful to them for not only driving, but enduring a serenade by a loud cat for most of the drive! Our friends also helped us pack the truck on Saturday. It took less than 85 minutes to get the whole truck loaded- AMAZING! We've been blessed in many ways!

At home

The house where Ryan and I lived the last 20 months is no longer home. We will no longer have friends to visit or be together there as a family. However, tonight I'm at home. I'm staying with my friend Angela. Her two little boys are in bed, and she is out running an errand. Her husband is at work. My heart is content. I know and love this family. People are what makes a place home.

After Ryan and his friend Chris left with the moving truck this morning, I washed all of the laminate floors throughout our house. The walls have been washed, and the lawn is trimmed. It looks like a pleasant place to live. However, the lump in my throat reminds me that I am not at home. I'm alone in that place. And so I gratefully accept invitations to stay with others... so I can be home.

I'm very thankful that even in that empty house I have gentle kicks from my baby within reminding me that she's there. In the silence and emptiness, I was aware of the Lord's presence much more clearly than normal. I hope that in my times alone there, I will grow more in love with my baby and my God.

In the last couple days, my appreciation for a home with loved ones has grown considerably. I'm looking forward to many nights in the next two weeks spent in the homes of friends. I want to enjoy their presence and companionship as I wait in this season of transition.

Melancholy

The reality of our move has been hitting me more and more. We are trying to work out the details of moving our possessions next week and then Kit Kat and I travelling with my dad a couple weeks later. I need to survive with the barest of necessities because I won't have much room in my car for anything besides the cat, my dad, and me.

Last night Ryan and I were sitting in the backyard after dusk. He had just mowed the lawn, and the evening was beautiful. I was suddenly very sad to leave. We had sold some of our possessions in the garage sale- nothing too important to us, but a couple things we kind of liked. I think that as a woman it is especially meaningful to have a place to call home. (Especially a pregnant woman that wants to be nesting!) In addition, it is a reminder that life passes quickly, and another chapter in our lives was coming to an end.

On September 11, 2005, our last moving day, everyone had already left, and I stayed behind to do some final cleaning at our house in Lansing. I remember crying as I looked at our first home with the beautiful hardwood for the last time. We can never go back to the way things were then.

Ryan and I took our honeymoon a couple months after our wedding. The night before our honeymoon we spent the night at my parents' house in Monroe. That was the last time I would be there. They were moving shortly after that time. I cried as we left to go to the airport. Unfortunately for Ryan I cried throughout that day and a couple successive days. I would not return to the home of my childhood. Things would really be different from that time on. However, I love visiting my parents at their home in Texas. It feels like home to me, probably more than the place in Monroe would feel now. That's good because we'll be staying there for a month!

So, we are trusting God for another place to call home. I look forward to the days when I can tell our children about how God provided for us in this crazy time. I also look forward to the days when we will be home forever with the Lord. For now, I'll smile through my tears.

Spring Shower

These are all of the beautiful ladies that were at my first baby shower last Saturday! They really blessed me! I can't wait to use all of the gifts with our baby. I'm especially excited about the Baby Bjorn.

We had a garage sale this morning. We made a lot of money- enough for two fill-ups at the gas station! That's a big deal nowadays. It is always amazing the things for which people will pay money. It feels really good to get rid of stuff. We had our sale from 7-2 and then we packed up the remainder, and I was home from dropping it off at the thrift store by 3. Now, I'm off to join Ryan for a nap, and then we have to get ready for our open house tomorrow. Now that we've gotten rid of a lot of stuff, we mostly need to clean.

Belly pix @ 25 weeks

I'm noticeably pregnant now, especially when I wear maternity clothes. Not very many strangers have asked about my pregnancy, but my students and friends comment on my belly quite often! They say that I'm really starting to get big and to show.

By the way, Kit Kat is doing great! (Ryan thought he should get a little press.) He (Kit Kat) loves to lay out in the shade. He's getting ready for the baby! I also ordered some tranquilizers from the vet for our 20-something drive to Texas. That will be fun- being serenaded by Kit Kat the WHOLE WAY!

Here's our schedule for moving:
Pack the truck in Ohio - May 26-27
Ryan and his friend Chris drive to Texas - May 28-29
Arrive and unload truck - May 29-30
Ryan and Chris party in Austin - June 1-2
Emily's showers in MI - June 2-3
Ryan begins class - June 4
Last exam in Emily's classes - June 7
Emily and Kit Kat drive to TX - June 8ish

Pray for us! We need it! Please also pray for a job for Ryan. He's finding lots of jobs for which to apply, but we need someone to notice his resume and qualifications out of the other applicants!

This and that

This is a picture of Kim and I this morning at 6:20 am! She ran the Flying Pig marathon in Cincinnati and did awesome (4:30!). It is so fun to have her (and Toonsis her cat) visit. I'm trying to convince her to run a marathon in Dallas next December.

I only have four more weeks of teaching left (plus a week of final exams). I normally don't count down to the end (at least not with any of the quarters this year), but my big lecture class is a challenge, so it will be nice when that is done. It just takes so much more preparation to teach a class like that. I much prefer to teach smaller classes that can be more interactive and hands-on. I'm not complaining, however. I have a fantastic job.

Ryan passed his Texes test for social studies teaching. He did great. He needed 240 out of 300 and he scored 259.